wondering

well....i found this somewhere so im copying it & posting it
there's something bout this thingy
im keep wondering...let us think bout this aite? so read it carefully
=|

A student asked a teacher, "what is love ?" The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the paddy field and choose the biggest paddy and come back.

But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick."

The student went to the field, went through the first row..he saw one big paddy,but he wonders....may be there will be a bigger one later. Then he saw another bigger one... but maybe there is an even bigger one waiting for him. Later, when he finished more than half of the paddy field, he started to realise that the paddy is not as big as the previous ones he saw.he knew that he had missed the biggest one, and he regretted !!!! So he went back to the teacher with empty hands.

The teacher told him, "...this is love... you keep looking for a better one, but later when you realise, you have already missed the person...."

" What is marriage then ?" the student asked.

The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back.

But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick.

" The student went to the corn field...this time he is careful not to repeat the previous mistake. when he reached the middle of the field, he had picked one medium corn that he felt satisfied with, and came back to the
teacher.

The teacher told him, "this time you have brought back a corn....you look for one that is just nice, and you have faith and believe that this is the best one you are to get.... this is marriage ."

fall nor fail which is it?

yet again...im doing my old habit again
oh damn it! why im doing this?
i wanna change...really badly i wanna change myself
haish! oh god do help me during this time
i am so needing you
please guide me

i have no one else to turn on too
no one that cares & matters

dead boy's poem

Within this darkness, my heart does lie,
Forever burdened with regrets that ever linger.
And though my only wish is to die,
These thoughts, your voice does hinder..

Fallen from my fate,
I stumble my way to you.
Fallen from your love,
I'm faced with all that's true.

Burdened with my sins,
I tremble as I stride.
Parted from the companions,
Of those who lived and died.

A lethal dose is all it takes,
To make this misery end.
They claim knowledge on those things,
They can never comprehend.

They say they too have suffered,
They say they know the pain.
They say they feel helpless,
As I slowly turn insane.

Caught up in the dream,
Given time with you.
Caught up in the dream,
With the person you never knew.

Tell me is this who you expected,
Who you really wished to see.
Relay your outlook on my life,
And pass judgment down on me.

Call the verdict as you may,
Sentence to my strife.
Give me the pleasure of sweet demise,
Or imprisonment in life.

Cast me down from your kindness,
As I embrace this tasteless sigh.
For hell is life without you,
And heaven's tempting when I die.

january memoirs part 1

January 2009
almost a month now going thru this new year 2009

problems do come to me like waterfalls
you guys just dont notice it cuz nobody knows what i felt & gone thru
well....this is me,this is the REAL me...i cant lie to you guys
seriously this is me, im so WEAK right now
life, studies, social...almost everything going to haywire
what cause this? im thinkin of every possibilities of it
and i found some of it...my fault,everything that is

so many things came up...but why? why this time?
oh god! i pray to you to make me more stronger, more patient to go thru all of this you gave me
i want to put all of this to an end...its killing me inside slowly
friends do come and go like some people say
but im thankful i got FEW friends that always with me
no matter ups & down, im sad or happy...
thank you guys, i dunno what to do without u guys
i just got you guys in this world its been 3 years
have you guys notice? no matter how far you guys are
you guys still call & text me asking about me...im so thankful
we are BROTHERS & SISTERS FOREVER!!

studies been sucks for me...i dunno where to start...
other problem? no need to tell...just give me some time
i end my part 1 memoirs for now...
to be continued very soon enough

bonafide

duh! headache!
problems come and go...but hey
what am i doing now?
sitting here, waiting here...no
im thinking of something

serebrum depeche

Its 2 weeks in the 2009
but so much has gone through me
i dunno to called it worse or better
which one is it? its unspeakable, unbelievable
so let me just say...this is what i must go through
this is life right? what else to do? haih!

its almost 5pm...dunno what to do
im kinda EMPTY inside...only GOD knows how i felt
something is not quite right here...but what can i do
im hopeless, blank, confused
its killing me inside, hurt
so just gonna wait here and do my usual things i do
but im never gonna FORGET, no matter what
this is my promise

off now...playing futsal at court
tourney is around the corner
getting prepared
TTFN

my january playlist

yes...my playlist for the month of january 2009
here are the some...
so enjoy people
=|

JANUARY PLAYLIST on my iTunes:-

Who Is She by Kris Mark
Say Goodbye by Chris Brown
Burn by Usher
Live Your Life by TI feat Rihanna
Sorry for The Stupid Things by Babyface
The Man Who Cant Be Moved by The Script
I Can Wait Forever by Simple Plan
Built To Last by Melee
Damaged by Danity Kane
Dear God & I Wont See You Tonight by Avenged Sevenfold
All That Ive Got by The Used
Sampai Menutup Mata by Acha Septriasa
Terima Kasih Cinta by Afghan
Mirage by Pesawat
Pari-Pari Di Bawah Angin by Meet Uncle Hussain
Pergi Jauh by Malique feat Lah Ahmad
Only One by Yellowcard
Wherever You Will Go by The Calling
Deeper Conversation by Yuna
Crush by David Archuletta
Superhuman by Chris Brown feat Keri Hilson
Selimut Hati by Dewa 19

this is my january playlist...
will be updating this playlist...
so wait
=|

thank you

thank you
i am thanking god ALLAH SWT
the most merciful, the almighty
i am very grateful cause i found this person
i am crying...yeah! to hell with that, people cried
this person completes me
this person love me the way i am
this person never lie to me
this person is everything to me
i am willing to die for this person even i have to burn in hell
just to make sure this person is safe
every single words this person says i believe in it
no even one second to doubt it

what makes this person so special to me?
only this person and i know this answer
i adore her
i love her
i need her
no one else can ever replace it, no one!

this song on my blog is for this person
i know you know this song, so.
enjoy...im off for now
im happy & i cry
=')

decode

i cant sleep people!
damnit!
gotta do something to make myself sleepy!

anyhow, my 2nd blog will becoming soon!
what is it about? i tell u the details later...
so watchout people! wait & see!

=)

why?

yeah why?
question that always revolve around us
so ask yourself why
why does this happen?
why suffering?
why so stubborn?
why keep doing this?
why? why? why?

ask yourself why
is it worth it doing like this?
why?

a week on the 2009

yeah...hello 2009,bye 2008
its been a week we're in the new year 2009
in this week,ive gone through so many things
from broken specs to "tok ma tongek"
from messy house to neat & tidy house
from blackout to mamak
from curve to shah alam
from not available to single
so many things happen even in just 1 week
yeah,people have theirs ups & downs
we gotta face it with our strength
all of this is a test from the above

anyhow,
to my bro,hazman
keep strong,im with you
anything just tell me
to my wife,marissa
i love you so much
nothing gonna ever change my love for you
i want to be your everything

4months and still going!

yeah! 4months and still going!
sayang, i do love you!
i do need you!
whatever happens i wont leave you!
happy 4th anniversary my wife nadia marissa!

=)